By Leslie Adams, AMFT #120800
As a MFT and a mom of two kiddos, I am knowledgable about the juggling act that is balancing work and home life. Working parents do not have it easy! From work obligations, child-rearing, and a to-do list longer than your arm. The challenges can feel absolutely overwhelming. I want to address the issues and also point out some helpful solutions for managing the chaos. These tips can help give you some much-needed balance to prevent burnout.
Picture this: You’re rushing to meet a deadline while also trying to remember if you packed your kid’s lunch and if the dog has been walked. Sound familiar? It’s like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded while riding a unicycle. Don’t worry and stop feeling like a failure. You are not alone in this circus act- there are so many parents out there struggling to make it through the day. Many working moms face the same exact problems. The key to managing them lies in setting boundaries and finding balance.
Setting Boundaries
Boundaries are important for everyone. For a working mom, boundaries are even more crucial. Due to the high demands of balancing career, family, and personal well-being. Boundaries are essential guidelines that we need to navigate the responsibilities we juggle. They define what is acceptable and manageable. This includes work commitments, family time, and personal needs. Setting boundaries means knowing when to say no. Also, prioritizing your time and energy. It’s okay to decline that extra project at work if it means preserving your precious family time. Remember, you’re a human being, not a machine, and even Iron Man needs to recharge his batteries. Setting boundaries is what allows working moms to maintain a healthy balance.
4 Quick Steps for Boundary Setting
- Identify Priorities
Recognize your priorities as a working mom. Be sure to include your career goals, family time, and self-care needs. Determine what is essential for you and your family’s happiness and well-being.
- Communicate Effectively
Clearly communicate your boundaries to your employer, colleagues, partner, and children. Articulate your needs, limitations, and expectations about work hours, flexibility, and family time. - Delegate Responsibilities
Give tasks and responsibilities to others when possible. Both at work and home. This can help lighten your load and create space for self-care and quality time with your family. - Protect Personal Time
Establish boundaries around your personal time. This might include self-care activities, hobbies, or relaxation. Ensure that you prioritize your well-being alongside your professional and familial obligations.
Barriers to Boundary Setting and How to Overcome
- Guilt and Pressure
Working moms may feel guilty about taking time for themselves or setting boundaries. Sometimes we feel like we’re not allowed to prioritize our needs. Pressure to excel at work and home can also make it challenging to enforce boundaries. Remind yourself that taking time for yourself allows you to avoid burnout. There’s no way we can manage everything once we’ve burnt out.
- Workplace Expectations
Workplaces that value long hours and constant availability can make it difficult to set boundaries. If possible, look for employers that are family friendly. You want a workplace that encourages healthy work-life balance. Practice setting automatic away messages. Commit to responding to inquiries during work hours only. - Family Demands
Balancing the needs of children, partner, and extended family members can be overwhelming. This feeling of overhwelm overrides our ability to set and maintain boundaries. If you’re not going to respect your time and energy, who will? Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish! It is an investment in yourself so that you can show up and be the best mom, partner, and family member that you can be. Its ok to rely on your village to support you!
Finding Balance
Healthy balance means balancing your responsibilities to others with your responsibilities to yourself. As a working mom, your responsibilities to others often lie at the forefront. To achieve balance, we need to shift focus on how we commit to maintaining our responsibility to ourselves. This includes investing in all sense of well-being and managing stress. You might roll your eyes when someone emphasizes the importance of self care. You might be shaking your head and thinking, “Who has time for bubble baths and meditation when I can barely find time to pee?” Trust me, I get it. But self-care doesn’t have to be extravagant or time-consuming. It can be as simple as taking five minutes to enjoy a cup of coffee in peace. Indulging in your favorite guilty pleasure TV show after the kids go to sleep. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. So fill yours up with whatever brings you joy and replenishes your spirit.
Once you find your zen, it’s important to maintain it.
5 Stress Management Strategies for Working Moms
- Holistic Care
Make it a whole body approach! Prioritize physical needs such as exercise and sleep. Try meditation to invest in that mind-body connection. Take your vitamins, keep hydrated, and eat well! Taking care of yourself physically and mentally can help you better manage stress.
- Set Specific Boundaries
Establish boundaries that protect your time, and physical and mental energy. Choose set times for work and family. Communicate these boundaries with your employer and family members. - Delegate Tasks
Delegate household chores and responsibilities to family members. Recruit whatever help is available to you. Sharing the workload can reduce stress and free up time for self-care and relaxation. - Time Management
Use effective time management techniques. Try creating to-do lists, prioritizing tasks, and using productivity tools or apps. Organizing your time can help you do more while reducing feelings of overwhelm.
- Seek Support
Build a support network of friends, family, and fellow working moms. Find those who can offer encouragement, advice, and help when needed. Don’t hesitate to ask for help or seek professional support if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Therapy provides a safe space to unload the burdens of work and home life. It is a place that is free from judgment or expectations. Whether you’re struggling with mommy guilt, burnout, or navigating the rocky waters of marriage. Therapy can offer insights and coping strategies to help you start living your best life.
As you navigate the wild rollercoaster ride that is balancing work and home life, remember to be kind to yourself. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is the perfect work-life balance.
