Finding Harmony: Balancing Work and Home Life as a Super Mom

By Leslie Adams, AMFT #120800

As a marriage and family therapist and a mom of two kiddos, I have both witnessed and experienced the juggling act that is balancing work and home life. Working parents do not have it easy! With work obligations, child-rearing, and a to-do list longer than your arm, the challenges can feel absolutely overwhelming. I want to address the issues that come up and also point out some helpful solutions for managing the chaos to hopefully give you some much-needed balance to prevent burnout.

Balancing work and home life is a tightrope act. Picture this: You’re rushing to meet a deadline while simultaneously trying to remember if you packed your kid’s lunch and if the dog has been walked. Sound familiar? It’s like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded while riding a unicycle. Don’t worry, and stop feeling like a failure, you are not alone in this circus act—there are so many parents out there struggling to make it through the day. Many working moms face the same exact problems, and the key to managing them lies in setting boundaries and finding balance.

Setting Boundaries for a Balanced Work and Home Life:

Boundaries are important for everyone. For a working mom, boundaries are even more crucial due to the specific demands of balancing work and home life. Boundaries are essential guidelines that we need to establish to navigate the multiple responsibilities we juggle. They define what is acceptable and manageable in terms of work commitments, family time, and personal needs. Setting boundaries means knowing when to say no and prioritizing your time and energy. It’s okay to decline that extra project at work if it means preserving your precious family time. Remember, you’re a human being, not a machine, and even Iron Man needs to recharge his batteries. Setting boundaries is what allows working moms to maintain a healthy balance between their professional and personal lives.

4 Quick steps for boundary setting:

1. Identify Priorities: Recognize your priorities as a working mom, including your career goals, family time, and self-care needs. Determine what is essential for you and your family’s happiness and well-being.
2. Communicate Effectively: Clearly communicate your boundaries to your employer, colleagues, partner, and children. Articulate your needs, limitations, and expectations regarding work hours, flexibility, and family time.
3. Delegate Responsibilities: Delegate tasks and responsibilities both at work and home to lighten your load and create space for self-care and quality time with your family.
4. Protect Personal Time: Establish boundaries around your personal time, whether it’s for self-care activities, hobbies, or relaxation. Ensure that you prioritize your well-being alongside your professional and familial obligations.

Barriers to boundary setting and how to overcome:

1. Guilt and Pressure: Working moms may feel guilty about taking time for themselves or setting boundaries that prioritize their needs. Pressure to excel at work and home can also make it challenging to enforce boundaries effectively. Remind yourself that taking time for yourself allows you to avoid burnout which is crucial to being able to maintain a busy schedule.
2. Workplace Expectations: Workplace cultures that value long hours and constant availability can make it difficult for working moms to set boundaries around their work schedule and commitments. If possible, look for employers that are family-friendly and encourage healthy work-life balance. Practice setting automatic away messages, and commit to responding to inquiries during work hours.
3. Family Demands: Balancing the needs of children, partner, and extended family members can sometimes override a working mom’s ability to set and maintain boundaries around her time and energy. Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish; it is an investment in yourself so that you can show up and be the best mom, partner, and family member that you can be. It’s okay to rely on your village to support you!

Finding Balance for Work and Home Life:

Healthy balance means balancing your responsibilities to others with your responsibilities to yourself. As a working mom, your responsibilities to others typically lie at the forefront. To achieve balance, we need to shift focus on how we commit to maintaining our responsibility to ourselves. This includes investing in our overall sense of well-being and managing stress effectively. You might roll your eyes when someone emphasizes the importance of self-care. I know you’re probably shaking your head and thinking, “Who has time for bubble baths and meditation when I can barely find time to pee?” Trust me, I get it. But self-care doesn’t have to be extravagant or time-consuming. It can be as simple as taking five minutes to enjoy a cup of coffee in peace or indulging in your favorite guilty pleasure TV show after the kids go to sleep. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup, so fill yours up with whatever brings you joy and replenishes your spirit.

Once you find your zen, it’s important to maintain it. Here are 5 stress management strategies for working moms:

1. Holistic Care: Make it a whole-body approach! Prioritize physical needs such as exercise and sleep. Try meditation to invest in that mind-body connection. Take your vitamins, keep hydrated, and eat well! Taking care of yourself physically and mentally can help you better manage stress.
2. Set Specific Boundaries: Establish boundaries that protect your time, and physical and mental energy. Designate set times for work and family, and communicate these boundaries with your employer and family members.
3. Delegate Tasks: Delegate household chores and responsibilities to family members. Recruit whatever help is available to you. Sharing the workload can reduce stress and free up time for self-care and relaxation.
4. Time Management: Use effective time management techniques such as creating to-do lists, prioritizing tasks, and using productivity tools or apps. Organizing your time efficiently can help you accomplish more while reducing feelings of overwhelm.
5. Seek Support: Build a support network of friends, family, and fellow working moms who can offer encouragement, advice, and assistance when needed. Don’t hesitate to ask for help or seek professional support if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Therapy provides a safe space to unload the burdens of work and home life, free from judgment or expectations. Whether you’re struggling with mommy guilt, burnout, or navigating the rocky waters of marriage, therapy can offer valuable insights and coping strategies to help you start living your best life.

As you navigate the wild rollercoaster ride that is balancing work and home life, remember to be kind to yourself. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is the perfect work-life balance. Embrace the chaos, set those boundaries like a boss, indulge in some much-needed self-care, stress management, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support when needed. Now, go forth and conquer, you magnificent multitasking maven!

Talk to a Therapist

The constant rush to meet deadlines while managing child-rearing and a never-ending to-do list can be overwhelming. By setting boundaries, prioritizing self-care, and effectively managing time, working moms can find balance and prevent burnout. Welcome to Outside the Norm Counseling, where we specialize in helping individuals, couples, and families overcome anxiety, depression, and relationship challenges. Take the first step towards a healthier, happier you—contact Outside the Norm Counseling today and start your journey to healing and balance! Call 951-395-3288 to book your in person or telehealth session.